Sydney
Dowse
3024615
Professor
Mike Link
EDUC
2530 (3)-005
March
13, 2014
In 2002, the
first edition of A Will of His Own was published and five years later
Kelly Harland published Will of His Own: a Child with Reflections on
Parenting Autism (Revised Edition). The revised edition is a collection of
stories shared by a loving mother of a boy who faces the challenges, triumphs,
and everyday adventures of life with autism. Unlike many writings on autism,
Harland posses interesting insights from her perspective as she and her husband
attempt to provide Will with the opportunities to succeed. Her insights are
integrated with Will’s emotionally vulnerable view of the world to provide the reader
with a better sense of understanding of their daily lives. Once noted within
her personal journal, the stories of Wills journey through life are now
displayed for the world to read and learn from. The book does a successful job
in providing readers with the information and detailed descriptions they need
to find themselves shifting perspectives between seeing the world from
Harland’s and Will’s eyes during her stories, and by doing this become much
more conscious of their situation. As I read through the collection of
anecdotes I felt myself becoming more compassionate and appreciative of Harland
and her son Will. The intent of this book is not for readers to feel remorseful
for the Harland’s but to grasp a better comprehension of what life is like living
with autism and see their specialized attempts to overcome challenges and move
forward in hopes others will be inspired to do the same within their own
situations, whatever they may be.
Will was diagnosed with autism at the age of 2 years old, since that very day
his mother had been keeping a constant journal of their everyday attitudes,
innermost emotions, struggles, progress, and achievement. This book reveals
many of these entries. Harland explains how unlike many children, obsessions and
irrational fears can be life -long and overwhelmingly consuming for children on
the autism spectrum. Through expressive descriptions of their personal
experiences, she shows how these aspects of Will’s life can drag a family into
a whirlwind of distress and exhaustion. Since Will is very sensitive to
alterations within his daily schedule and surroundings, his limitations and
adaptation to new things are often a source of frustration. She writes about
incidences that ignite Wills overwhelming feelings of anxiety, fear and
confusion that cause hyperventilation and endless amounts of tears. Will has
encountered countless situations where the slightest alteration can ruin his
day. Many of these things most people go through the day not noticing, such as
a clanging of a railroad bell, the flipping of an “open/close” sign on the
local bakery, the appearance of the divider stick on the conveyer belt at the
grocery store and many others.
Many entries however focus on Harland and her husband’s support for Will and
their attempts to provide him with the most predictable world as possible in
hopes that he will be able to cope with his environment in a calm and positive
manner. She describes her sons challenges as “the autism that invades Will’s
entire person, that forces him to require concrete structure and repeating
patterns in order to make sense of anything, can leave him in an extraordinary
vulnerable position if that structure is missing”(p.26). It is because of this
that Will feels threatened by many things a lot of the time. Since Will lives
for repetition and sameness, the Harland’s must mentally prepare Will for any
slight modification, such as the closing of a chain store located on his school
route (in which he will be devastated over the loss, and take weeks to recover
from), the introduction of a new couch, or even the replacement of a light
fixture within their home. They use multiple techniques to prepare Will for the
changes including verbal and visual explanation and the use of “social stories”
(drawings made of a little stick boy doing the everyday stuff kids do,
explaining how and why they are doing it). Weeks of preparation go into
changing of a bed comforter for example, and in the particular story she told
about the comforter, the preparation does not always work and Will will lash
out, and the comforter will be donated. The aftermath often includes days of
discussion of why things are where they are, and why it made him so upset.
Although it is a optimistic feature Will has to share why things bother him,
his parents are still attempting to reduce the irritation and channel his
aggression into a positive (or at least a neutral) response when experiencing
change.
As I finished the book I sat and reflected upon the numerous components that
Harland had incorporated. I found that the book provided information over a
spectrum of different aspects of living with autism. The book was filled with
important information that many textbooks do not provide such as personal
experience and perspectives that help readers understand autism to a greater
extent. Since it was written as an autobiography style that included Harland’s
and Wills emotions I was able to connect on a personal level and make
compassionate considerations throughout the entire reading. I found myself
stopping in the middle of the passages, and thinking to myself how I would
react if I were in her place, and what kind of approach would I use to help
Will find solutions to his current concern. Although textbooks and other novels
provide us with information about the autism spectrum they rarely allow us to
put ourselves in their shoes and see the situation in a different light. It was
interesting to see that not all attempts made by her and her husband to
decrease Wills anxiety were successful, and it had taken them manly sleepless
hours to come up with new strategies and integrate them in Wills daily life. I
genuinely supported her and her husband through each story since no matter how
many times Will lashed out or how many times their strategies failed, they
never stopped trying and never gave up hope and were able to see Will’s
improvements over the years. Harland wrote her entries in a special way that
enabled readers to take a step back and see the world through Wills eyes and
learn a lot about his daily challenges and what we can do to support his and
others development.
This book is a must read for families faced with an autism spectrum disorder
and for professionals who work alongside of these youth. As Harland shares her
family’s journey through the maze of autism, families alike can be encouraged
by knowing that they are not alone, and that they too can find joy in life by
looking at life through this unique perspective. This book is a valuable read because
it will provide reads with a better understanding of life with autism, a
comforting realization that families are not alone in their struggles, and a
sense of hope that no matter what challenges they face, children will be able
to rise to the occasion and make tremendous progress throughout their lives.
All in all this story revolves around a boy trying to find his place in the
world and his parents supporting him every step of the way while hoping the
world will treat him with kindness and openness. An underlying message that all
readers can take away from this book is “we cannot direct the wind, but we can
adjust our sails” (p.145).
Woks Cited
Harland, Kelly.Will of His Own: a Child with Reflections on
Parenting Autism (Revised Edition. London and Philadelphia: Jessica Kingsly
Publishers, 2007. Print.
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