Paul Esteves
March 18th 2014
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For this narrative essay I read The Diving Bell and the Butterfly,
written by Jean-Dominique Bauby. In Jean-Dominique’s autobiography he writes
about his life as an editor in chief of one of the most well respected fashion
magazines in all of France. One day, when going to pick up his son, he suffers
a cerebro-vascular accident affecting his brain stem. After slipping into a
coma he awakes to find himself only able to move his left eye. However his
cognitive functioning is still fully intact; this is known as locked in
syndrome. The books talks about his struggles through this condition in which
he is unable to move, eat, or talk, his only form of communication is through
blinking his left eye. When I was reading this book I had a very open mind as
the book goes from past to present often. You never knew what to expect, one
moment he his confessing his darkest moment and they next he is cracking jokes
about his situation.
The entire novel is Jean- Dominique
narrating his struggles through locked in syndrome. The novel is set mostly in
this Berck hospital bed where he endures the mental battle of day-to-day
life. He describes his current physical
state as a cocoon, yet his mind, which is still free, is a butterfly. His mind
is his escape from his condition, his imaginative and impressive use of imagery
allows him to relive his favorite moments in life with the people closest to
him. Weeks after he awakes he in greeted by several doctors that had created a
special wheelchair just for him, they dress him in an effort to bost his
morale. He can hear the doctors talking and he is now under the impression that
he will make a quick recovery of his speech and movement. Yet once he enters
the wheelchair he realizes he truly in a quadriplegic, his hopes of recovering
and gaining his life back are now crushed in front of his eyes and the real
struggle sets in.
His condition has caused him to lose
sixty-six pounds in twenty weeks, yet he still manages to make a joke about it.
His regular sessions with his physiotherapist Bridgette keep his optimism up as
his movement is very slowly coming back, the phrase “We need to be very
patient” is becoming a constant reoccurrence. Jean- Dominique’s only form of
communication is his left eye, he must blink one letter at a time until he has
spelt the word, then eventually a sentence. This of course is extremely
difficult in the French language and it has many complex grammar rules. His
first visitors arrive grieving over his condition; they dare not finish a word
or sentence for him, yet, when visitors spend most of them time rambling on he
feels a sense of relief as he is not left answering their questions they ask in
fear. His relief didn’t last too long, since he was unable to care for himself so
the nursing staff took care of those duties. One day while he was being pushed
in his wheelchair he noticed a reflection in the glass; the reflection was his
own. For the first time since the accident he saw what he had become, a half
deaf paraplegic that could not care for himself and could only move his left
eye. Despite his sudden realization he began to laugh, an uncontrollable
nervous laughter. Even though he was physically left with only a working left
eye he still maintained mental composure. The naval hospital in which Jean was
staying was once a children’s hospital and housed many children during the
tuberculosis epidemic after World War II. Which is now geared towards
geriatrics, has many twists and turns that Jean has yet to discover, his favorite
of which is Cinecittà. A part of the hospital in which its balconies give way to a
beautiful red and white striped lighthouse that is accompanied by the Berck
shoreline. This is a major tool for Jean’s geographical imagination, the sight
of the open sea and the beautiful landscape it holds liberates his mind as his
imagination takes flight. His creativity has him being the greatest director of
all time to Pierrot la Fou (a famous French film character). His imagination
was his only grasp of sanity.
Jean’s life had
become very routine, the same thing everyday. A routine that would drive most
insane, physiotherapists visiting, nurses checking in and changing him, doctors
monitoring his health and visitors wishing him the best. Yet his highlight from
all these routines is when Sandrine, his speech therapist, works with him. If
it were not for her, he would be cut off from the outside world, this is who
set him up with blinking the alphabet to communicate. Even though it is only
his guests, Sandrine and his psychologist that understand his method of
communication he is still able to have that connection outside of himself. A
week before his stroke Jean spent the night at his fathers house as he did not
feel well, in the morning he shaved his father before he left. This is a memory
that has remained engraved in his memory, as this was the last time he saw him.
His father still calls him from time to time and talks to him even though he
will knows he will never hear his son speak again. Drowned in negativity, Jean
turns to imagery yet again to focus on the positive memories and things about
his greatest memories with his father.
Before Jean was
hospitalized he had an even bigger job then editing a major French fashion
magazine, he was a father. His 2 children Theophile and Celeste are both in the
prime of their childhood, young and full of life, the exact opposite of Jean.
The sight of his children enjoying his presence makes his day and fills him
with joy, for the time being that is. Once they have left he sits and wonders
where his relationship with Josephine (his children’s mother) went wrong. In
his reflections he talks of the trips they took together, the destination
unknown to both of them. They were both stubborn and loving in their ways, yet
this is something that is popular in the French culture. Jean only recalls good
vivid memories that keep him going in his daily on going mental battle. Six
months after he began his new life Jean realized how much concern had been
pouring out to him, he decided to address everyone in a letter updating his
progress and to end the rumors floating around from his former co-workers.
These letters were yet another means of escape, as it occupied his mind on what
his friends and family were thinking, rather then focusing on his new life. He
vividly recalls the day where he finally was able to take a wheelchair ride
down to the beach, accompanied by Claude (the lady dictating the book) and Brice
(his long time partner in crime). Brice is his dearest and oldest friend who he
started his magazine with. They shared stories and laughter as they walked
along the beach; this was not a normal day in which he reflected on his life
and was then saddened by his present state but a day in which looking back he
felt pride and accomplishment in his work. Seeing Brice had made him realize
that he had worked so hard and accomplished what he set out to do.
Locked-in syndrome also
greatly effects your hearing as well, yet it is in the plain silence of his
hospital bed that Jean sees the beauty in the simple things around him that he
can hear with little difficulty. Through this all you begin to understand how
his view on life begins to change. It is not until the end of the book that you
learn how that incident happened. Friday December 8th 1995, Jean woke
up as usual and prepares for his day at work. He is set to take Theophile to
the theater after work, as they will spend the weekend together. His driver
picks him up from an exhausting day and he is on his way to the country to pick
him up and return back to the city. They pick up Theophile and he is slipping
away, he beings to feel the sweat on his forehead and can’t breathe, he
collapses in his seat. He recalls feeling like he had taken an LSD tablet.
Theophile runs to his aunt’s house only blocks away, she is a nurse. She
insists on getting him medical attention. He spends the next moments worrying
about Theophile and how they would go to the play the Saturday night, soon
after he sinks into a coma. He died March 9th 1997.
For a young man
that does not read very often, this was a pretty good read. The heavy subject
matter of the book may seem like a lot to take in but the witty underlying
humor that Jean incorporates to his story makes you smile. His realism is
evident since after every rant or reflection he comes down off that high back
to his reality. Through the difficulty of the situation he manages to see the
bright side, he is not mad he has locked in syndrome but he is simply happy he
has lived, loved and laughed. His love for life simply over powered the
negativity of the situation. The novel was difficult at times to read since the
setting and sometimes the time even changes at every chapter. Many times a
chapter would recall a certain memory that would think about as a reminder of
this life. In reading this book you realize that life can change in the blink
of an eye. Never take anything for granted, as you never know when it could
end.
In conclusion,
Jean- Dominique wrote a beautiful book that teaches us all to enjoy what we
have for as long as we can. Potential readers should understand that this will
give you a new outlook on life. It made me take a good look at my own. Even
through the heavy content in the book it holds a great message everyone should
understand.
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